PARSHAS Pinchas 5785
Watching Our Words
Nina Ehrenkranz
Senior Educator
A renowned surgeon had performed countless surgeries, saving many lives in the process. One day a patient came to him with a complex illness requiring a delicate operation. The surgeon approached it with focus and expertise. The surgery seemed flawless, and he felt relieved and accomplished.
But days later, the patient’s condition worsened, leading to an untimely death. The doctor was devastated. He reviewed every step, examined his methods and decisions, but found no error. His once-pristine reputation was overshadowed by the tragedy. Believing he had failed, he considered resigning. How could he continue healing if he had caused harm?
As he drafted his resignation letter, a young nurse came forward, pale and shaken. She confessed a terrible mistake—she had forgotten to sterilize the instruments. The germs, invisible to all, caused the infection that led to the patient’s death.
The surgeon was stunned. It was a mix of relief and sorrow. He realized that even the most skilled hands depend on clean tools.
I heard this Jewish parable years ago, and its message stayed with me. Our most powerful tool as humans is speech. Words can build and heal through praise, gratitude, and encouragement. But they can also destroy—through gossip, criticism, and slander.
When we misuse speech, we defile the very mouth we use to pray to G-d. Would we present ourselves to G-d with a tool covered in “germs”? Yet we often do just that when we speak lashon hara (evil speech) and then expect our prayers to be heard.
Lao Tzu said, “Watch your thoughts, for they become words.” To improve our words, we must shift our mindset, seeing others more positively and speaking with kindness. Our lives would be better for it.
King David taught in Psalms: “Who is the man who desires life…? Guard your tongue from evil.” Positive speech leads to a better life, because it changes how we see the world.
During “the Three Weeks,” a time of mourning in the Jewish calendar ongoing now, we reflect on the destruction of the Temples, caused by baseless hatred. What better way to rebuild than by improving our speech, the foundation of relationships?
This year, a friend invited me to study Words Change Worlds by Rabbi Menachem Salasnik (thank you, Julie!). Each day, we learn to refine our speech. Recognizing its power—to lift or break—is the first step to change.
This week, let’s pause before speaking to a spouse, friend, or child. Ask: Is this really worth saying? A brief pause could change everything—for them and for us.
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